Tag archive for » nurture «

Three Tips for Getting Through Thanksgiving Conflict

Thursday, 17. November 2011 19:03

A while back, a NY Times article about food, kin and tension at Thanksgiving by TARA PARKER-POPE caught my eye.  Pope shares several tales of woe and some insights, including the following:

“As families gather around the country this week to celebrate Thanksgiving, many of them are bracing for the intense emotions of the holiday meal. The combination of food and family often brings out longstanding tensions, criticism and battles for control. Simple issues like cooking with butter or asking for seconds are fraught with family conflict and commentary.”

Sadly, I’ve sat at that table of criticism and felt vulnerable and abused.  So what to do if this sounds like your upcoming blessed event?  Three little ideas to keep in your pocket to help get you through the holiday:

1) Create a sense of calm by breathing deeply. Notice that when you breathe in and out for four counts, three or four times in a row, it is hard to be tense.  Find the place of deep relaxation within you through by focusing on your breath.  You know it’s there.  When things get testy, get relaxed.  Take a breathing break.  Maybe the snide remark won’t mean so much to you.

2) Play the grateful game.  Challenge yourself to be grateful for everything for the day. Feel grateful that you have a family and/or friends to share Thanksgiving with, even if they are annoying.  Take a moment to feel grateful for every mouthful of food you consume. Chew slowly, taste every bite.  And, if someone says something snide, you can respond from a grateful place, and maybe invite them to participate.

Here’s a for instance: What if you hear, “Don’t you think you’ve eaten enough dessert Catherine?”  One example of a grateful response you could use (but only if you believe it) is, “I am so grateful that you care about me Aunt Rita and that I’m able to spend this time with you.  In fact, I am really enjoying every single bite of this delicious dessert.”  You can then move on, or ask Aunt Rita, “What are you grateful for today?”

3) Give yourself permission to do whatever is most loving for you.  Allow yourself to take charge of your own life for this one day. (Wouldn’t it be great if you could do that every day?)  Love and accept whatever choices you make – as long as you are not purposefully seeking to cause pain to yourself or someone else.  Call in sick if you really can’t face the gang, or allow yourself to eat a huge portion of pie and more – if it makes you happy.   If guilt rears its ugly head – remember that you lovingly chose your actions to nurture yourself. If you are truly at peace with your choices, then what others say won’t matter much.

Read the archived NY Times article here: http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/11/23/turkey-with-family-drama-on-the-side/

So tell us, what are your tips for Thanksgiving?

Category:Family, Relationships, Wellness | Comments (1) | Autor:

Five Tips for a Great Relationship

Monday, 11. October 2010 14:16

Okay, whom do you spend the most time with? You might guess it’s your boss or your kids, but ultimately, it’s yourself. So how is your relationship with you? Do you enjoy your time together with yourself, or are you often unkind, inconsiderate and unforgiving? Why do you expect anyone else to treat you better than you are willing to treat yourself? Here are some thoughts and suggestions about how to nourish and nurture your most important friend: you. 

1. Appreciate and acknowledge. Find ways to acknowledge yourself for all the good things you do. If you only acknowledge the things you don’t do, then you are only feeding half of the equation – the negative half. A daily practice of expressing gratitude to yourself (just one to three items!) can go a long way in putting things in perspective and making for a happier, more relaxed you. Once you take stock, you may be amazed by all of what you do accomplish!

2. Rest and enjoy some quiet, quality time. Take a few minutes to stop and breathe. Look around you. What do you see? Close your eyes, feel what is going on, and listen. Check in. What message lies within the silence? Even a few minutes of rest can make a big difference in your attitude and your connection to yourself. Don’t ignore quality time with your best friend: you.

 3. Schedule time for fun, pleasure and connection. Want to keep your life feeling joyful? Well, you deserve a break – even if it’s fifteen minutes a day of listening to music, walking, calling friends, doing Suduko – whatever it is, make a little time to feed your soul with something you love and make it smile.

4. Give your body a hug. Your soul lives in a body. Just notice it and thank it for all it does. Thank it for protecting you, for moving you and for allowing you to feel the world. Even though it may have some issues, remember all that it can do. Can you feel the wind? Enjoy a hot shower? Eat and drink tasty tidbits? What would life be like without your body? Pretty tough to enjoy the simple things. So, be nice to it. Feed it, give it rest, consideration, and maybe even a hug once in awhile.

5. Clarify your values, visions and goals. Keep your dreams alive. Where do you want to go? What do you strive for? How might you get there? What’s important to you? Can you take one small baby-step each day toward that goal? If you know what gives you meaning and purpose and what you stand for, making daily life choices become easier and often less stressful.

Would you deny your best friend any of these kindnesses and support? Enjoy and nurture your relationship with yourself. You will always be there, why not treat yourself like a best friend?

Category:Relationships, Self Actualization | Comment (0) | Autor:

Smart Lessons from a Successful Entrepreneur

Sunday, 16. May 2010 17:29

Loved this article from Women Entrepreneur!  The three lessons I take away for the budding entrepreneur (male or female)  are these:

1) Get support from friends and partners;

 2) Pick up new skills and education if you need them; and 

3) Be FLEXIBLE!  If your original plan has flaws or gets offtrack (oh yes, it will!) rethink, replan, reconsider, restrategize.  You may need to redesign your business approach, but you may not need to abandon it entirely.  This is a key lesson for success! Be creative. You can do it.   Here’s the article and the link:

Entrepreneur Succeeds With Wit and Grit

‘It’s all about being creative,’ says Tina Aldatz, who faced her now-or-never moment and landed on her feet.

By: Eve Gumpel   |   05/12/2010

URL: http://www.womenentrepreneur.com/2010/05/entrepreneur-vanquishes-obstacles-with-wit-and-grit.html

Category:Career & Finance, Uncategorized | Comment (0) | Autor: