Bring Back that Lovin' Feeling

If you haven’t read your latest issue of Scientific American, you may miss out on practical exercises for building intimacy.  Robert Epstein, article author, longtime researcher, professor and PhD, has created dozens of exercises based on a distillation of scientific studies of how people learn to love each other. 

The basic concept is that when you increase vulnerability between two people you increase intimacy.  So if you are working on strengthening your love bond with someone close to you, here is a summary of the eight exercises from the article for your consideration  (and don’t worry, you keep your clothes on):

1)      Two as one:  Embrace each other gently and gradually try to synchronize your breathing for a few minutes.  Eventually, you may feel that you are breathing as one person.

2)      Soul Gazing:  Stand or sit about two feet away from each other and look deeply into each other’s eyes for two minutes.  Then talk about what you saw.

3)      Monkey Love: Stand or sit fairly close. One partner should start moving their hands, arms and legs any which way, while the other perfectly imitates the other partner’s movements. 

4)      Falling In Love: This is a trust exercise.  From a standing position, simply let yourself fall backward into the arms of your partner, (make sure that he or she knows what you are doing before you fall!) Then, Trade places several times. Talk about your feelings after you’re done. 

5)      Secret Swap:  Both partners should write a deep secret on a piece of paper.  Then trade papers and talk about what you read.   You can repeat this process over several days until there are no more secrets to tell.

6)      Mind-Reading Game: Write down a thought that you want to convey to your partner.  Then spend a few minutes wordlessly trying to communicate that thought (with your mind) while your partner guesses at what the thought is. If your partner can’t guess, reveal the thought and then switch roles.

7)      Let Me Inside:  Focus on each other while standing about four feet away from one another. Every 10 seconds or so, move a bit close until you are as close as you can get without touching.  (Warning, this exercise might lead to kissing)

8)      Love Aura: Place the palm of your hand as close as possible to your partner’s palm without actually touching. Do this for several minutes to feel heat, and sometimes, other kinds of energy.

 If you want to read more, you will need to get the magazine or visit the makinglovebook site below and look for the link to the article.  Epstein also has a book that looks interesting, called Making Love: How People Learn to Love and How You Can Too ( ). 

Happy Valentine’s Day!

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Date: Friday, 12. February 2010 3:15
Trackback: Trackback-URL Category: Love & Sex, Relationships

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